omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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