im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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