Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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