1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
