I hate all girls vehemently.
I need help removing her.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Randomize