She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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