New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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