Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
