Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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