If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
