Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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