just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
