How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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