Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I believe in your delicious
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
There are leaves in my underwear?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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