I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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