Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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