"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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