wat bout pragnant strippers??
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
