i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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