I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
