I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
