I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
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