i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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