I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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