Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
