I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
