You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
