Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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