He is an equal opportunity slut.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
