also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
