when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
