Don't you send me to vm
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
