I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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