he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
