her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
