so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
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