THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
