After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
