i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Your dad touched me again.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
