Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
