I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
