My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
