Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
