He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Randomize
