Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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