Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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