Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
