Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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