My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
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