also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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